Worry Management
Take one worry at a time. This tool helps you tell the difference between a worry you can act on and one you can only set down — and then do something kind with each.
What's on your mind?
Write the worry down in your own words — as plainly or as messily as it arrives. Naming it takes it out of the swirl, and that alone often eases something.
Is there something you could do about this?
Some worries point at a real problem you can take a step on. Others are “what if” worries about things outside your control. Both are completely normal — they just need a different kind of response.
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What could you do?
List whatever comes to mind — including the options you'd never actually choose. Nothing here is a commitment; you're just widening the picture. Three or four is plenty to work with.
Which one will you try?
Your options, ordered by how workable they felt. Choose one to plan — it doesn't have to be the perfect answer, only the next step. If two feel equal, take the one that asks less of you.
Now make it real
A worry loosens its grip when it becomes something with a where, a when and a first move. Keep it small and specific.
Downloads a calendar file (.ics) you can open in Apple Calendar, Google Calendar or Outlook.
Let's give this worry a time and place
You're not being asked to stop caring, or to push the worry away. You're postponing it — writing it down now, and keeping a short time later in the day when you let yourself worry about it properly. Worry gets a place, instead of the whole day.
Twenty minutes, same time each day
Choose a time you're unlikely to be interrupted. Early evening tends to work well — late enough to gather the day, early enough that it isn't the last thing before sleep.
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Waiting for worry time
Coming back to now
Once the worry is written down, gently return to whatever you were doing. Your senses are the quickest way back: notice five things you can see, four you can hear, three you can feel, two you can smell, one you can taste. If that feels like too much, one sense is enough. The worry will come back — write it down again and return again. It gets easier with practice.
Take each worry in turn
— How did it feel when you wrote it down? How does it feel now?
— Did the thing you feared actually happen?
— If it did, how did you cope?
— Is any of this no longer a problem?
— Would worrying about it all day have changed anything?
— What could you be doing instead?
When the time is up, stop — even mid-thought. Some people find it helps to tear up the list and start tomorrow with a clean page.
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You don't have to solve everything today. Doing one kind, deliberate thing with a worry is already enough.
Come back whenever a new worry needs sorting. If worry is taking over more of your days than you'd like, please talk to your GP or a psychological wellbeing practitioner — you deserve support with it.
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